She lay underneath the stardust and moonlight
and looked for monsters in the night.
It was believed that a black hole
was actually a beast with an undefined shape;
it was a dark metallic mess of
unknown particles that roared
across the galaxy, eating stars.
And she would stay up every night looking for it,
waiting for it to move its shiny diamond spine.
In the shadows, monsters would come out.
She only had to imagine them and they would be real.
They had a certainty that no one else guaranteed
and so she would sit out in the forest and play with her mind.
Sometimes she would stand out in the rain
to feel the weight of someone else’s sadness
because all she could feel was infinite emptiness.
Eating everything she could feel but
nothing seemed to satisfy that deep hunger within,
her taste buds longed for something,
something she had felt long time ago,
a luminous memory from another galaxy.
Strange whispers in the night glowed in her palm,
started absorbing its radioactive chemicals into her.
It spread slowly. Her veins glowed like mercury.
Its flavour seeped into her unconscious.
She could barely taste it but she knew
this was what she was craving.
The whispers told her about the monsters she had yet to meet.
There were ones that she could keep and
ones that would be painful secrets.
They spoke to her from time to time,
told her to look for them.
Sometimes she wanted to pull away and escape.
But what was she running from?
Her fear made her feel nauseous
like she was sky sailing.
Still she stayed and looked for the beast inside,
and when she got too close she could see it
behind his eyes.
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